Hope. It's a foundational tenet to the Christian faith. A search of the ESV Bible finds that word in 160 verses throughout Scripture. Throughout Scripture you see hope - in Genesis you have hope that God will reconcile humankind to himself after the fall, and hope in Abraham's journey to the land God promised him. Exodus chronicles the hope that God will rescue his people from the slavery of Egypt. Hope fills Judges, as the people of God look for deliverance from their oppressors. The psalmist frequently talks of hoping in God. Fast forward through the prophets and you see the hope developing in the people of God for a Messiah, a Savior. That hope we see culminated in the Gospels as God became man and came to dwell on earth to be the Christ they were seeking. But the theme of hope continues, as the New Testament turns then to hoping for Jesus' final return when he will reconcile all things to himself. Romans 15:13 explicitly refers to our God as "the God of hope." 1 Corinthians 13 reads that "love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things...so now faith, hope, and love abide, these three."
That's a super-brief overview of hope in the Bible. 1 Corinthians 13 links it to love, and I would argue that it's inextricably linked to faith, as faith is hope for the future based on a track record of the past. Can we then agree that hope is a central theme to God's story of his people?
Now that we've established this, let's go on a personal tangent. The subject of hope has been rattling around in my mind for months now. Over the past year I've been growing in a lot of areas. I went through the Freedom Sessions program at my church, and experienced God's work in my heart. I've been digging up baggage in my past and reconciling it with God and with others. One of these pieces of baggage has been fear of romantic relationships. And one of the cool things that has happened over this past year has been opening up to those sorts of relationships.
Unfortunately, this opening up has not particularly resulted in what one would call "success". The all-too-common refrain has become, "Jon, you're a great guy, but I have zero interest in a romantic relationship with you." And hope of there ever being any other response is getting so painful. It's becoming easier and easier for me to "realistically" (cynically?) expect that will always be the response. That my expectations from before I was asking women out are accurate. It seems it would be better to allow my dreams for a romantic/family relationship of my own to wither and die than to go through the heartbreak of keeping them alive. And that's the path I've been tending towards in recent days.
Now, I recognize that God has not promised me fulfillment in this life, nor has he spoken anything about what family relationships I or anyone will have in this life. And I also affirm that God can and does work outside of human hope - that those who are not hoping for something can still receive that thing.
I'm getting the impression though that "spiritual disciplines" are about more than our direct interactions with God. An extrapolation is necessary here. 1 John 4:20 says, "If anyone says, 'I love God,' and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen." I think that in a similar way, hope is something that should characterize us as believers, rather than being something that you either do or don't do in specific circumstances. By exercising hope, in whatever circumstances, I would be training towards hope as a character trait. To add to that, 1 Timothy 4:8 reads, "for while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way, as it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come." So, for me, hope will be a spiritual discipline.
This doesn't make hope easy. As a child, I don't remember hope being hard, but maybe that's the result of having hopes not brought to reality as we grow up. One of the Scriptures that has been so comforting to me has been Proverbs 13:12 - "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life." It reminds me that if this verse is in God's Word, it means that he understands this feeling that many days is almost overwhelming.
I don't really know how to wrap this up. Honestly, I wasn't even sure where this was going to end when I sat down and started writing. Maybe I would say that this isn't a struggle that has long passed me by...this is something that's happening right now. And if you also have trouble hoping, maybe this will help your journey. And let's talk.
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